Family has deep ties to Ukraine

A Cloquet family has been living with their collective heart in a knot since Russia invaded Ukraine, worried about the fate of a girl they once thought they would adopt, and a Ukrainian family that instead made them part of their family.

It's a long and complicated story, but Cloquet's Carmen Purcell says she is 14-year-old Sonia's "foreign mother" and she wants the teenager to come and be safe here while war rages in her homeland. Purcell plans to fly to Poland if Sonia can get out, or to chaperone kids for the nonprofit Legacy Refuge.

Because of the ongoing war and uncertain future, the Pine Knot is not revealing the Ukrainian family's surname or home city.

Purcell explains that she and her husband, Craig, realized the 9-year-old girl they thought they were adopting had a family in Ukraine after she arrived in Minnesota in 2016. She spoke very little English but, with the help of Google translator, they eventually found out the adoption agency in Minnesota hadn't done its homework on a new, unethical Ukrainian contact. The agency convinced families their children were being "sponsored" by Americans, while the Americans thought they were adopting them.

At one point, Minnesota's Sen. Amy Klobuchar's office got involved because it was considered a case of child trafficking, albeit unintended on the part of the seven Minnesota families. In the case of the Purcells, Sonia ended up staying with them in Cloquet for nearly a month in 2016 before flying home to her mother and father.

"It was very tearful," Carmen said. "We had this bedroom all painted for her; my husband told me: 'Shut the door, paint it white. I don't want you to open it,' because he was just heartbroken."

But there's a happy ending, at least for the Purcell family, because they ended up gaining an extended family in Ukraine after traveling there in late 2016 to visit Sonia's family.

"We got to know so many people there," Carmen said. "It's a culture that is very rich in tradition."

She said when they walked through the doors into a home, their hosts threw salt over their heads for good luck. "And they peeled like this little chunk of bread and popped it in our mouth, because it was like a certain bread they make, and you have to eat this bread as well," she said.

"Everyone just wanted to welcome us," she said. "It was very warm, lots of meals together and laughing."

In 2019, they tried to get Sonia and her mom a visa to visit them in the U.S., but it was denied. Then they planned to go back to Ukraine in 2020, but the Covid-19 pandemic got in the way.

Sonia's dad is disabled after a car accident, and her mother won't leave without her father. They live far away from the Polish border, northeast of Kyiv, and it's not possible or safe for Sonia to travel alone.

Carmen Purcell has been searching the internet for anyone who could help them get Sonia out of the country. She continues to search for help and communicate via social media with her Ukrainian friends. In the meantime, she is collecting local donations of needed items and money.

She still plans to fly to Poland at the drop of a hat with Justin Hayslett of Legacy Refuge, one of the Minnesota parents who was duped in 2016 but then started a nonprofit "ministry to Ukrainian orphans," which includes helping facilitate U.S. adoptions and sponsorships for the children.

On Monday afternoon, unsure of how soon she would take off for Poland or the exact situation with Sonia's family, Carmen acknowledged that she has a lot to figure out before she can go. Still, she is determined and unafraid to ask anyone - here or overseas - for help. As of Wednesday night, she was still exchanging photos and information with friends in Ukraine, and trying to figure out how exactly to help.

"I've never done anything like this," she said. "I'm a person in Cloquet who has a few connections and I'm just going."

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Want to help?

Locally, check out Carmen Purcell’s Facebook page at http://www.facebook.com/carmen.purcell.5 or stop by the home with the Ukrainian flag flying at 703 Granite St. in Cloquet.

A list of reputable organizations at ukrainewar.carrd.co was put together by Ukrainians and a former Buzzfeed reporter and includes everything from military donations to providing medical supplies and helping children.

Additionally, the Salvation Army has staff in Ukraine service centers, including Kyiv, providing food, toiletries, clothing and spiritual care for those affected by the military aggression occurring now. Visit https://give.sawso.org/give/393706/#!/donation/checkout to support their efforts or mail checks with the memo notation “Ukraine” to Salvation Army World Service Office, International Relief Fund, P.O. Box 418558, Boston MA 02241-8558.